identity
40 Days! First Sunday of Lent 2023
Sermon notes from February 26, 2023, the First Sunday of Lent at St. Timothy’s Episcopal Church.
Good morning, again, St. Timothy’s family and friends and all who have gathered for worship. As we gather around our scriptures on this the last Sunday of Black History Month and the First Sunday of Lent, may the words of my mouth and the meditations of our hearts be acceptable to you, O God, our Rock and our Redeemer. Amen.
Our Gospel story this morning is important to us today for several reasons, the first being because the 40 days in which Jesus fasted in the wilderness is the model on which we have created and practice the season of Lent, 40 days of preparing for Easter, 40 days of self-denial, reflection, prayer and repentance. Just a quick review of the math… Lent began on Ash Wednesday this past week and if you count all the days from Ash Wednesday through Holy Saturday, the day before Easter Sunday, minus the Sundays of Lent, you have 40 days.
Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tested by the devil. He fasted forty days and forty nights, and afterward he was famished. The tempter came and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread.” But he answered, “It is written, ‘One does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.’ ”
Then the devil took him to the holy city and placed him on the pinnacle of the temple, saying to him, “If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down, for it is written, ‘He will command his angels concerning you,’ and ‘On their hands they will bear you up, so that you will not dash your foot against a stone.’ ” Jesus said to him, “Again it is written, ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’ ”
Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory, and he said to him, “All these I will give you, if you will fall down and worship me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Away with you, Satan! for it is written, ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve only him.’ ”
Then the devil left him, and suddenly angels came and waited on him.
Matthew 4:1-11, NRSVue
Let’s Talk About the Text
These 40 days in the life of Jesus are recorded for us by Matthew and Luke, in chapter 4 of both Gospels. Mark mentions that Jesus was tested for 40 days, but doesn’t tell us any of the details. Matthew, Mark and Luke all give the story of John baptizing Jesus and the Spirit descending as a dove with a voice from heaven just before the temptations, but in John’s Gospel he has John the Baptizer tell the people about the baptism and descending Spirit in a bit of a flashback.
Between Matthew and Luke’s accounts of the temptations we have substantially the same stories, but with a slight variation. They change the order of the the second and third temptations, and Luke doesn’t specify a mountain for the high place where Jesus is taken up. In Luke’s Gospel, when the tempter leaves Jesus, Luke says the tempter leaves until an opportune time. That’s important and we’ll come back to it. In both Matthew and Luke the tempter begins twice with “If you are the son of God…” and all three times Jesus answers the temptations with scriptural quotations.
Now, in the context of his day, this story is happening as Jesus moves to begin his public ministry, and it feels a lot like a right of passage, doesn’t it? It feels like a proving ground of sorts to show that he’s ready to do his ministry. In Matthew, Mark and Luke this event immediately precedes the beginning of his public work. So for Jesus I don’t think we can completely dismiss how powerful a testing and beginning this was for his ministry.
Picture for a moment the sequence of events… Jesus is baptized, the Spirit descends and a voice proclaims Jesus the beloved and pleasing Son, and then *BOOM* that same Spirit drives him or leads him into the wilderness time of testing.
That Jesus was in the wilderness place for 40 days is a possible parallel to the people of Israel wondering in the wilderness for 40 years after God brings them up out of Egypt, referenced several times as 40 years in the book of Deuteronomy. I feel like most Jewish readers of the Gospels would have caught that parallel from the stories they had heard and studied all their lives.
The meaning and message is that something important is happening here, something is about to begin! The temptations are a middle space of sorts, a liminal space, the space between God witnessing to Jesus at his baptism and Jesus being ready to start his work.
Three Temptations
The three temptations are most important, I think, in their relation to the life of Jesus: 1) Jesus is tempted to break fast and miraculously create bread, if he is the Son of God, 2) Jesus is tempted to prove God’s promise of protection by attempting self-harm, if he is the Son of God, And lastly, 3) he is offered the world, if he will renounce God and worship the tempter.
We may wonder at the temptations, and they are bit exotic compared to the temptations that so often come our way, right? I mean, we might be tempted to cheat a little in tax season, roll a stop sign when we think no one is watching, tell a lie, have an extra slice of cake, or on a really bad day we are tempted to give into our temper, anger and frustration. But testing God? Miraculously creating bread? Worshipping some other god? Not so much.
It’s crucial for us to recognize that these temptations have everything to do with the ministry Jesus is about to start. They have everything to do with the way Jesus is about to go and call people to “take up their cross and follow” him. Let’s look at it:
- His ministry will not always be a warm bed and a full belly, and if those are his priorities then he wouldn’t be ready for starting his ministry.
- His ministry will be full of opposition and danger, but not the thrill-seeking or irresponsible testing God instead of faithfully following God.
- And certainly, if Jesus was getting into ministry for fame, glory and riches, for personal gain, he wouldn’t have been ready or able to do the ministry to which God had sent him.
So our Gospel writers are giving us this clear and unambiguous picture of a Jesus who is ready; he’s named by God at his baptism and tested in the wilderness as the very people themselves were tested, and is ready to begin his work for God.
And Identity Issue
And that brings us to where I think our lives and the life of Jesus begin to cross and overlap in this testing story. I think that this is very much a story about identity. First we have the baptism, the Spirit descending and the voice proclaiming the identity of Jesus. Then the tempter would sow doubt with that “if you are the Son of God…” business. And we have Jesus rooting his answers, his heart and mind, in the scriptures. He establishes his faith and trust in God in the face of the temptations.
This is an identity issue here at the beginning of the public ministry of Jesus: Jesus is showing who is he and who he will be. Will he be able to keep his focus on God and the kingdom business for which he was sent, or will he be tempted to seek self-satisfaction? Will he trust in God or have a fickle heart which questions and tests God’s love and care? Who is Jesus? Who will he be?
You know, Lent is an identity issue, our identity issue. Who are we? Who will we be? Who do want to be? This season is our chance to again take stock of our lives, review our hearts and minds, and make the changes needed to head in the direction we want to be going. We are reminded that God has proclaimed divine love for us and named us daughters and sons, children of the Most High… and God calls us to a Holy Lent, a self-testing of our motivations and priorities and faith in the love and work of God in us and the world around us.
Who we are and who we will be are questions for us to decide.
If you have not begun a fast, it’s not too late. If you have not yet thought about a practice of self-reflection and internal examination, it’s not too late to begin. If you’re just now thinking about the Lenten Season as an opportunity to go deeper into who you want to be and the direction you want to be headed, today is the perfect day to get started.
No Novice to Choosing God
Remember that we mentioned in Luke’s Gospel, Luke makes sure to mention at the end of the temptations that not only did the tempter leave Jesus, but left him until an opportune time. These temptations were a struggle for Jesus, even if it looked kinda easy to us in the way the story is told. Truly, it looks like Jesus had no trouble at all with these temptations, doesn’t it? Rapid fire scripture quotes, no hesitation… and yet, having fasted, being so weakened, this had to have been an opportune time for the tempter. I think, if we step beyond the stylized way the story is told, Jesus looks like he handles it so easily because he has prepared himself. This is not his first time to choose God. He’s been choosing God for some time now, and so when the testing gets tough, he’s able to continue to choose God, to stand firm in what he’s chosen.
Just quoting scripture isn’t enough, nor does simply quoting scripture necessarily show wisdom or relationship with God; the temper finally resorts to it in trying to catch Jesus. But I believe we see that Jesus has made the effort to know scripture in the context of loving God and choosing God, so it is a strength to him. Jesus has chosen God and grown in God before the temptations, and that gives scripture the power to strengthen him and uphold his faith.
Let’s Put in the Effort
Let’s do the work of choosing:
- Let’s choose a fast that makes room in our lives for good things to happen. Let’s choose a fast that creates space and recognition of our desire for God. Fasting is not just denial, but it’s about making room for opportunity and potential.
- Let’s set aside time for prayer, setting alarms and creating space in our lives that prioritize prayer, so that it’s not just an afterthought or forgotten intention. Prayer is not just asking for God’s help, but also living in God’s presence.
- Let’s prioritize opportunities and resources for going deeper with scripture and our faith; let’s lean into our midweek study times and our Morning Prayer times on Mondays and Thursdays. If you’re a reader, get a good book. Find some uplifting and strengthening music. Make time to talk and pray with a trusted spiritual friend. Use the time of Lent to create helpful and faithful routines that will carry on into the rest of the year!
Who are we? Who will we be? Who do want to be? These are not questions we ask and answer just one time, but every day and with each breath. And the more we choose God the better able we are to hold onto our choice when the wilderness times and storm times and times of weakness come our way. So may our Lenten practices and observances strengthen us in our choice of God, of faith and of one another. May our faith be made strong and our choice of who we want to be in this world made firm.
May God, the God of wilderness places and the God of difficult times, be our help and strength when moments of testing arise. And may we practice choosing God and following the example of Jesus who knew who he was to be and wanted to be. In the love, the grace and the calling of God. Amen, amen and amen.
Love My Enemy?
The Question
Jesus said, “Love your enemy.” (Matthew 5:43-48) What does it mean to love my enemy? I’ve been thinking about this a bit lately. It seems appropriate to talk about as our culture continues it’s “war” and daily divides along a myriad of lines, political, religious, racial and economic. And it’s not just the “culture,” it’s often me. I seem to have enemies. Some are pretty up front about it and tell me clearly of their disdain for me, but others seem to have more of a guerrilla tactic of sniping quietly from the trees and hills, little hits and nicks here and there that seem minor at the time, but become a real issue for me.
And of course there’s the third angle… there’s the people I don’t like. I figure that most of us know we all have people in our lives we don’t like. We may hope that we able to rise above such a thing, and we may exert a lot of energy to rise above viewing all people with anything over than love, but we fail. I fail.
That’s when the words of Jesus then come ringing in and oppress me. He commanded love for enemies. A part of my gut reaction to that is to feel as if “I am told to lose.” Most of our enemies are not just in conflict with us, but also in competition with us. I also feel a reaction deep inside that says, “He doesn’t know my enemy.” Surely, if Jesus knew how much hurt I was feeling from the malice of another, he’d be as peeved off as I am! And finally, I have to admit that often at my core, I’d rather beat my enemies. You know, I’d prefer to get a little Psalmy and smite the skulls of those who would encircle me, right on?
So……….. I’m trying to find some things that “love your enemies” might mean in my life. What does it really mean to love an enemy? For me? Can I do this? Do I want to do this? Will I do this? Each question just surfaces another one, or three, or fifty questions.
I have to start with myself. After all, the command to love enemies is mine to own. It’s not a command that necessarily alters the enemy, it changes me. Here’s where I’m starting:
Love Your Enemy = I Am Not A Victim (even if I was victimized)
I need to step off the stage every time I start to feel like singing my woes. I am not a victim and my enemies do not control me. Victimization is too often an experience that becomes an identity. Of course, there are victims among us every day, and we are victimized. I would never try to lessen the pain or impact of anyone who is a victim of a violent or horrible crime or hurt. In my own life some things have been more painful and less painful at times, but my response needs to be consistent that I am not defined by the hurt.
The recent theatrical incarnation of Les Misérables gets some pretty mixed reviews, but I totally enjoyed it. One of the most haunting lines for me is in Fantine’s song “I Dreamed A Dream” when she sings, “…but there are dreams that cannot be / and there are storms we cannot weather…” The sentiment is echoed again in the song “Empty Chairs at Empty Tables” when Marius sings, “…there’s a grief that can’t be spoken / there’s a pain goes on and on…” I can’t speak for anyone but myself here: I know what they mean. But even as these lines resonate with me in deep ways, I also recognize that I must turn away from darker, hopeless view, even when justified by my own pain.
I cannot be a victim, defined by the injury done by my enemy, if it I am to love her/him. Love is not denial. Love is going to require that I find my way out of the identity formed by my injury. If someone abuses or attacks me in a way that devalues me, I must re-find my value. If the attack cause me pain, I need to heal. If the attack demoralizes me, I need to regain strength and courage. I will do these things so that I can return to the task of loving. I cannot do this alone. If Jesus commands it, I need Jesus to help me do it, and I’ll probably need you, too.
Love Your Enemy = Forgiveness
Just as love is not denial, neither is forgiveness. Forgiveness begins as my own way of releasing the need to punish, to avenge, to hurt another, to attack, to rationalize my own violent needs. Forgiveness is hard because when I choose to forgive I am choosing to shoulder the burden of paying for another’s crime. At least if Jesus wanted to command something he was willing to demonstrate it. On the cross, he spoke what I think might be some of the most awesome words uttered in the gospel narrative, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.”
What? Yes, they did! They knew what they were doing! Can I accidentally crucify someone? Could they have tortured and murdered so cruelly without intent and premeditation? What is Jesus saying? Is this the blindness and denial I fear that my own forgiveness might represent? Or is it a conscious decision on the part of Jesus to remake the world around him? Those words are a one-sentence-wake-up-call and alarm that something is happening here that breaks the ordinary into sharp little pieces.
Forgiveness is re-creation. When I can actively forgive I am re-creating things and myself. This is not a simple switch I throw or a decision I make. It’s a set of reflexes and intentional actions I take to make forgiveness real. And I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not the best at it. Forgiveness will look and feel a little different for each person, reflecting our intrinsic variety as individuals, but it will always need to have the hallmarks of active, authentic forgiveness. Jesus forgave, and still hung on the cross. He still died. I think the reality of his forgiveness is in the narrative of his resurrection. He didn’t come busting from the grave like one of our contemporary action heroes might, kicking butts and slapping bad guys. He came forth and said, “Everything I taught you is still in force, my own pain and hurt doesn’t change a thing… go love, love God, love one another, love enemies… go do it, go teach it, go live it… everywhere… every when… with everyone.” (Yes, that’s my paraphrase and interpretation of Jesus after his resurrection. I personally don’t want the “great commission” in my life and experience of it to ever be divorced from the power of Jesus’ humble, courageous grace.)
Love Your Enemy = I Don’t Have Enemies
Unfortunately, I am me enough to get sidetracked by the statement Paul makes about enemies, that seems so close to what Jesus says, but adds that in doing so I will be “heaping hot coals on the heads” of my enemies by my love. I am bent and base enough to chuckle that Paul seems to offer me such a slick way to get revenge on an enemy, simply by loving. Is that not a bonus and a half? I really can kill him/her with love!
One of favorite authors and speakers is Fr Richard Rohr, a Franciscan out in Albuquerque, New Mexico. I have heard him a couple of times mention what he calls “a low reading of scripture” and “a high reading of scripture.” I think it’s Fr Rohr’s very polite way of telling me how childish I am sometimes, lol. Whenever I read scripture in a way that gives me license to hate or attack or be mean/vengeful/negative, or in any way move against the actual fruits of God’s Spirit in my life… love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control… in those moments I have misread scripture. So, for Paul and the Proverb he seems to be quoting, I will choose to focus on the summation of “Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.”
Whether my love for an enemy is a purifying fire or a painful fire for my enemy, or more accurately feels like hot coals on my own head… it’s still love and not my need to punish or avenge myself. And for my part, if I love someone, it’s hard to call them an enemy at all. We may still disagree on things, we might still need to work on the consequences of their actions, or mine… but in the act of loving I am re-creating their role and place in my life. One who is loved is the antithesis of an enemy… she/he is precious, cared for, sheltered, redeemed.
The Answer
I wish that writing a blog post about love made me love better. The only thing a blog post might actually signify is that somewhere along the way I have recently realized a deficit of love in myself. It’s too easy to blame my “enemies” for that lack of love… they are either too unlovable or too deserving of hate. It’s too easy to make some quick excuses for myself… I drank too much, I’m too tired… or I didn’t really mean it, I just knew it would get a lot of shares and likes from people on Facebook who are angry or biased like me!
And that’s the reality. I recently find myself withholding posts and shares because I know they don’t stem from love, but from the hate I’m harboring deep inside. I find myself sitting in the corner of the room rubbing my hands together and evilly chucking “bwahahahahah” over the attack posts I could launch if I wanted to… and then, baby, they’d know how stupid they really are! Quite an image, huh?
Withholding the attack posts is only part of the equation for me… facing the reality of my own anger and lack of love is the other half. Dang it, having enemies can really enliven me! And just as my cat would love to shred my favorite couch, it would feel too good to sharpen my claws on the idiocy of another.
“They don’t know what they are doing” is not denial, it is re-creating myself. It is the reality that whether they know anything or not about what they do, I am still to know myself, and I am to carry the responsibility to make myself. No one’s action or ignorance is license for me to abandon that call.
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